You can hide your pain from the rest of the world
Conceal your suffering with a smile
All day long you can fake to the world
But it does hurt deep inside

Because everything isn't fictional :)

Fearless

This is for a friend of mine who has been through a lot in this year. I just want to tell her that no matter what, don't lose hope and never be scared to fall for someone once again. 


Falling in love is fabulous,
Falling in love after being hurt so bad, is fearless :)

Took this pic from my 2 mp blackberry camera on my last day in Mumbai sitting on Marine drive. 

A quatrain

Stop fooling me like a three year old

To this Big bad world I'm not new.

I know all the games you play,

Because I play them too.

I'm that girl

When I'm deliriously happy, I randomly start to sing.

The one who looks at all her pretty friends and feels inadequate.

I'm that girl who looks at the mirror trying to find something worth being happy about,

who silently cries, breaks down when you shout.

I'm that girl who won't question your intentions,

who'll keep trusting you, unaware that you were in only for fun.

I'm that girl who may build opinions pretty fast,  but I never hesitate to change them.

I'm that girl, awkward, sitting alone,

The one, while you all are already interacting,  is staring blankly at her phone.

 I'm that girl who really wants to tell you how she feels,

Who is scared those feelings may somehow hurt you, so she keeps her lips sealed.

I'm that girl who listens to songs and writes down stuff to avoid goin crazy,

Who maintains a diary, doesn't want those good memories to turn hazy.

I'm that girl who gets goosebumps, smiles and cries her heart out listen to a T.Swift song,

Because her songs say what I'd want to say,

In the best possible way.

I'm all this. And much much, much more!! Sometimes a bore. Even an eye-sore.

I'm that girl.

Took this poem from Blahblaholics blog. not written by me, but perfectly describes me :)

http://thisistherealitarin.blogspot.in/

The 'why' chromosome

My recent shift from Mumbai to the capital city wouldn't have been a pain if I would have been guaranteed the same amount of freedom I enjoyed in Mumbai. My mom made it very clear in the beginning that the evening parties and the frequent trips with friends will have to come to an end considering my most crucial year in school and yes, safety reasons.
Ask any Delhi girl, of any shape, size,weight,age and she would have faced an assault of some kind of the other. The visual assault begins as soon as you step out of your house. Men stare unabashedly at your legs and then their view shifts upwards sneering intently.Cast an angry look, and they shift their gaze like a reflex action. And then they start humming songs and tunes like they never saw you.Seriously, what's wrong with Delhi men?
We Delhi girls are trained to deal with men right since puberty hits us, or maybe even earlier. Because here, nobody helps us when we get stuck in such situations. We help ourselves.I remember a particular incident when I was travelling in a bus with my grandmother and a guy who was shamelessly leaning on a girl got slapped by her. Rest of the people in the bus were just mute spectators to the shamelessness of the man. Use public transport in Delhi only if you want to get groped by the public. Sad, but true. Further, no guy will offer you a seat in Metro or Buses. They will keep sitting there as if it is their birthright and when asked to get up from the seat allocated to ladies they will look at you in a queer manner and inevitably get up from their seat. The mere look on their face will force you think that it's better to stand in a bus packed with people rather than getting cold and dirty looks. We are a subject to scrutiny from the drivers of taxis to the salesmen at malls. They would stick around us like sticky toffee in our teeth which sticks to the crevices. "What size madam?" "This will look good on you, please try!". The tone of their voice indicates that this is not to promote sales, but a result of rising testosterone levels. Hurl an abuse or two and then the dangers of becoming a victim of acid attack will linger on for a long time.
A statement I read somewhere which I denied initially but suddenly makes sense "A woman can travel from North to anywhere in the country but cannot travel from anywhere to the North." My recent relocation to Delhi has made me pay more attention to the above statement. Though sexual abuses, eve teasing and rapes happen all over India, Delhi breaks all records. Women aren't safe here. They are subject to sheer disregard and abuse, both inside and outside the womb.

Alice in wonderland.....and back

The collective sound of footsteps in the corridor, teachers yelling in the class, students screaming at the top of their voice echoed in my ears. I was back to where I belonged but it was a mixed feeling.A feeling of nostalgia mixed with despair. Nothing had changed much on the surface, but underneath it didn't feel the old self again. I could spot familiar faces in the crowd and the smell of canteen food was unchanged, but I could not connect with it like I could earlier do. I felt that I had been in a wonderland for two years, and now was pushed back into the real world. The world to which I belonged to...